Simply Stacy Poetry

A Lyrical Journey For the Heart & Soul

The Journey To Loving Me and She…

I literally had to become an adult before I learned how what I think manifests into what I speak and what I speak ultimately turns into what I do.  Women I encountered outside of my mother, unknowingly taught me how to dislike other women, without knowing them.  I became conditioned, not because of what I experienced, solely based off of what I “learned” by hearing to “size her up.”  Now, let’s put a little bit of logic to how a person heals, transforms, and grows out of such behaviors.  Learned behavior develops in layers, year after year after year… thick and stacked high!  It takes time to remove those layers, thought processes over time, but God can do anything and He can do it quickly (His quick is not our quick though ha ha!) Something happens to break through one or a few of those layers and as each layer is peeled away, the freer that person becomes, their thoughts change, ideas change, perceptions change.  That’s exactly what happened to me… and the root of why “I didn’t like her… without even knowing her… is because I didn’t like me.”  I had to first learn to sincerely love me, I had to believe what I said about me, for real.  You know we live in a world where it’s easy to pick up a mask, place it on, live for the day, take it off, go to sleep and do it all over again day after day, month after month, year after year.  I did that, lived behind the mask of false confidence, I didn’t like what I saw when I looked in the mirror and that made it easy to dislike others, women especially, especially women who had confidence.

God broke through to me, me being completely unwilling of course… but He did.  It was in those moments, I learned, that when God sets out to accomplish something in you, it will get done and the sooner you say yes, the more impact He will have.  He gave me two daughters… they came from me, I couldn’t teach them the ugliness that resided in me.  The process began of loving me, because of how much I loved them.  I had to first accept and love the color of my skin.  I am dark skinned and within my culture and outside of my culture, I was made to feel that dark skinned women aren’t beautiful. I bought into those lies, I didn’t like the skin I was in and on top of that, I have an overbite, I walk with a limp due to a birth defect, I’m big-skinny (fat stomach, small legs, big chest, fact face) LOL, I know, silly… but I didn’t like who I saw when I looked at me, thought about me.  I remembered the words of life my momma spoke over me as a little girl. I started to believe the words my husband affirmed over me, and the how my daddy said I was beautiful. It started there, I knew when I looked at my daughters that they were beautiful and I wanted to make sure they believed that about themselves when I told them that.  In doing that, I was reminded that I couldn’t expect them to believe me, when I didn’t believe my own mother’s words.

Anyway, God began to break down the layers and with ever layer removed from me, I was able to see my fellow sister in a different light.  I found myself after about a 15 year delayering process loving me.  I loved the beauty, the variety, the originality of women.  My black sisters, were becoming works of art in my eyes, no longer beings that I disliked because of my own insecurities.  She was the epitome of beauty to me. When I looked around I saw different types of women, shapes of women and it encouraged me.  I was inspired to accept my originality and now I want to be surrounded.  I am interested in learning about the different gifts each woman possesses, I want to embrace my fellow sisters of my culture and other cultures, identifying with our similarities and understanding our intricacies.  I want to kill the stereotype that I’d once made my reality… “Women just don’t get along.”  That’s a false statement that I want to bury with every woman that God blesses to connect with me.  I love me…. and now I can love she because we are one in the same, originally made.

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July 26, 2015 Posted by | The World Outside Your Window | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Just A Beat of My Heart…

Tonight WP I sit in a very familiar place; I can feel the tears welling up in my eyes and at the same time I feel them spilling over in my heart.  I am at a place that I’ve been before, I know it, I feel it.  So tonight, I am here not to vent or bring you down, but to encourage you all. Remain positive, NO MATTER WHAT life throws your way; remember what’s thrown at you, you CAN handle!  Hurt when left untreated can fester, corrode, and turn into a hardened rust that only God can heal.  Anger when left to sit can spread like a virus and infect everything and everyone it comes in contact with.  So someone may ask, “How do you deal with that?” “How do you cope?” Start by thinking on better thoughts… you can’t produce what isn’t already in your heart to come out…

Life is not an easy feat, it was never meant to be, however, I believe life was meant to be a journey full of lessons that results in blessings.  Some of the lessons we’re meant to learn in life don’t come to us in an easy way and those are the ones that I believe stick closest to your heart, the lessons that you can walk someone else through to help them avoid going through what you did to get what God intended to teach you.  So, tonight I sit here in the place of “Be anxious for nothing but in EVERYTHING give thanks…” and I have to do just that… in EVERYTHING… my angst, my hurt, my nervousness, I will GIVE THANKS!

I am not religious by any stretch of the imagination, I do however have a relationship with Jesus Christ and I believe He has something GREAT in store for me if I conquer this moment that attempts to ail me right now.  I just wanted to connect with you all WP Family; I pray you all have a beautiful evening and continue to be ENCOURAGED!Image

February 25, 2014 Posted by | The World Outside Your Window | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

What It’s Worth To Know Your Worth

We all live life, go through certain experiences, encounter people, situations, accumulate things that leave us with either a lesson learned or another lesson to go through; however at the end of the day, after all you’ve done, do you truly know your worth? Do you know what God requires of you? Do you love yourself enough to know that you need to do what He’s calling you too? Do you value yourself to tell people No they can’t have access to you? Do you know your worth?

See, we were all created for a specific purpose that works into a common goal and if we all do our part it’s apart of a larger collective.  However, what’s stunted the growth in that process is people not knowing their true value.  You see when you were born, you learned behaviors, developed patterns based on what you saw and what you were taught.  That’s why it’s important to be mindful of what’s spoken into the life of a growing child, what’s done around them, what’s done to them because it becomes them.  The product of who you grew into came from what was sown into you.  If you didn’t have enough positive affirmation spoken into you, you probably grew up feeling insecure, if you weren’t told you were beautiful you’re probably seeking that validation of yourself from someone else.  But this blog is for you to help YOU know your worth, without the validation or affirmation of anyone else. 

We have years of behaviors and patterns to be broken off our lives that will help us arrive to the place of security, confidence and belief that we are as beautiful as God says we are.  When you get to the place of believing in what God says about you, it is ever learning.  You will have to fight to keep your security because so many distractions will come to drag you back to the bless of unbelief in who you are, who God created you to be!

You’re worth more than material possessions, worth more than fruitless relationships, worth more than someone telling you what you need to hear so they can get what they want out of you.  It’s worth the quality of your life to know your worth!

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August 18, 2013 Posted by | The World Outside Your Window | , , , , , | Leave a comment

This Trip Called Life — Processes

When you know who you are you don’t have to spend time trying to convince people that you are; you just be who you are…

The life you lead, once you realize it’s not your own, the easier it will be to surrender to God’s will.  You’ll begin to see your desires differently.  You see there are a lot of life lessons that we’re expected to learn once we give our lives over to Christ.  One of the biggest lessons in life is PEOPLE: how to respond to them, how to deal with them, how to love them etc.

People will judge you; nine times out of ten judgment comes from them not truly understanding who they are themselves, so it’s easier for them to highlight the flaws and imperfections in you.  People will speculate about you, and yes, say things about you that are JUST NOT THE TRUTH…but the good thing is, the truth can stand on it’s own and God, Who is the Truth, will always prevail.  The thing we all have to do as human beings is be delivered from people.

A couple quick life lessons: 1) Everything that’s said to you doesn’t require a response from you 2) Everything that’s said about you, doesn’t require a reaction from you 3)  All that you’re required to do is what God asks of you — the people you seek out to validate you are imperfect too.  You can’t gain validation from a being that is seeking validation themselves.  When you’re focused on pleasing God, it shifts your focus from pleasing them.

Going through the transformation from being an approval addict to God approved requires you to go through a process.  God processes aren’t always easy, but they’re worth it! You have a lot more choice in the life you live then you think you do.  Question is, who are you giving priority too?

Don’t look for anyone else to affirm or validate you…do it yourself firstImage

July 21, 2013 Posted by | The World Outside Your Window | , , , , , , | Leave a comment

   

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