Simply Stacy Poetry

A Lyrical Journey For the Heart & Soul

The Journey To Loving Me and She…

I literally had to become an adult before I learned how what I think manifests into what I speak and what I speak ultimately turns into what I do.  Women I encountered outside of my mother, unknowingly taught me how to dislike other women, without knowing them.  I became conditioned, not because of what I experienced, solely based off of what I “learned” by hearing to “size her up.”  Now, let’s put a little bit of logic to how a person heals, transforms, and grows out of such behaviors.  Learned behavior develops in layers, year after year after year… thick and stacked high!  It takes time to remove those layers, thought processes over time, but God can do anything and He can do it quickly (His quick is not our quick though ha ha!) Something happens to break through one or a few of those layers and as each layer is peeled away, the freer that person becomes, their thoughts change, ideas change, perceptions change.  That’s exactly what happened to me… and the root of why “I didn’t like her… without even knowing her… is because I didn’t like me.”  I had to first learn to sincerely love me, I had to believe what I said about me, for real.  You know we live in a world where it’s easy to pick up a mask, place it on, live for the day, take it off, go to sleep and do it all over again day after day, month after month, year after year.  I did that, lived behind the mask of false confidence, I didn’t like what I saw when I looked in the mirror and that made it easy to dislike others, women especially, especially women who had confidence.

God broke through to me, me being completely unwilling of course… but He did.  It was in those moments, I learned, that when God sets out to accomplish something in you, it will get done and the sooner you say yes, the more impact He will have.  He gave me two daughters… they came from me, I couldn’t teach them the ugliness that resided in me.  The process began of loving me, because of how much I loved them.  I had to first accept and love the color of my skin.  I am dark skinned and within my culture and outside of my culture, I was made to feel that dark skinned women aren’t beautiful. I bought into those lies, I didn’t like the skin I was in and on top of that, I have an overbite, I walk with a limp due to a birth defect, I’m big-skinny (fat stomach, small legs, big chest, fact face) LOL, I know, silly… but I didn’t like who I saw when I looked at me, thought about me.  I remembered the words of life my momma spoke over me as a little girl. I started to believe the words my husband affirmed over me, and the how my daddy said I was beautiful. It started there, I knew when I looked at my daughters that they were beautiful and I wanted to make sure they believed that about themselves when I told them that.  In doing that, I was reminded that I couldn’t expect them to believe me, when I didn’t believe my own mother’s words.

Anyway, God began to break down the layers and with ever layer removed from me, I was able to see my fellow sister in a different light.  I found myself after about a 15 year delayering process loving me.  I loved the beauty, the variety, the originality of women.  My black sisters, were becoming works of art in my eyes, no longer beings that I disliked because of my own insecurities.  She was the epitome of beauty to me. When I looked around I saw different types of women, shapes of women and it encouraged me.  I was inspired to accept my originality and now I want to be surrounded.  I am interested in learning about the different gifts each woman possesses, I want to embrace my fellow sisters of my culture and other cultures, identifying with our similarities and understanding our intricacies.  I want to kill the stereotype that I’d once made my reality… “Women just don’t get along.”  That’s a false statement that I want to bury with every woman that God blesses to connect with me.  I love me…. and now I can love she because we are one in the same, originally made.

Advertisements

July 26, 2015 Posted by | The World Outside Your Window | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Just Like You

She was created by the Hands of God
Just Like You
She endures pain
Fights through past shames
Just Like You
So why is it that you
Growl at the sista
That walks on the sidewalk by you
Y’all have never met before
She hasn’t done a thing to you
Yet you form your lips to say stuff like,
“Oh, she think she cute”
Could it be the existence of her
Highlights insecurities in you?
Questions, we all as women
Need to ask
Because let’s be honest
We’ve all been here a time or two
But like anything else in life
There is growing we have to do
When will you stop
Disliking your sista
Who’s JUST LIKE YOU
To hate her, is to hate you

©SimplyStacy Copyright 2013. All Rights Reserved.

‪#‎Unity – let’s break the barriers and go against what statistics says women typically do!

Image

August 3, 2013 Posted by | The World Outside Your Window | , , , , , | Leave a comment

She’s A Better Friend To Me Then I Am To Her…

Hagahurth

How many of us will be honest and say we’ve either been the friend undervalued or the friend doing the undervaluing of the people we call “friend”??

I found myself undervaluing people I called friends after being undervalued for so long by the people I thought were my friends. After being subjected to a pattern of behavior for so long you ultimately develop a characteristic that reflects what you’ve been through. Yea, that’s me…no excuses, accountability is accepted.

The principles you operate in the most are the ones that derive from the hardest experiences you endured to learn them, wouldn’t you agree?

One of my biggest mistakes in life has been affording the title of friend to people before allowing God to direct me as to their placement in my life. Huge mistake! There is nothing wrong with giving folks the benefit of the doubt, I mean that is the least one could do. However, you have instincts for a reason, you have the ability to deductively reason and most importantly, I probably should’ve listed it first, Spiritual guidance. I mean, God created you, He’d be the BEST One to tell you who should be in what position in your life.

Misjudgment of character pertaining to friendships, lead to hurt feelings, bitterness and discord. A person that God might’ve meant to enter your life for a season for a particular reason you make an eternal friend. You give them a charge that they aren’t equipped to handle because you don’t take the time to consult God and allow Him to guide your steps as far as how you should build the relationship. This often leads to painful breaks in relationship, anger, hurt feelings, etc. The list goes on and on.

I’m on the journey of doing better because I know better. A series of experiences has caused me to assess how I am as a friend, reflecting on past mishaps in relationships I’ve had with folks, looking at current relationships, making sure I understand who serves what purpose in my life.

We can’t live on one accord if we each don’t understand our individual purpose. That responsibility is on us as individuals, to spiritually connect with God, gain an understanding and acceptance of who we are in His eyes and work toward understanding our overall purpose in life and the lives of those He connects us too.

May 7, 2013 Posted by | The World Outside Your Window | , , , , | Leave a comment

   

Entertaining Christianity

Serious topics with ridiculous adjectives

Dancing With Scars

Joyous but broken, my people dance with scars.

sistersthatshare

Just another WordPress.com site